Chaucer maybe made up Valentine's Day, but that's ok! The real St. Valentine probably was a loving dude. Which is what I've been thinking about lately. Just being a real loving dude.
Real quick, I like this from Wikipedia:
While the custom of sending cards, flowers, chocolates and other gifts originated in the UK, Valentine's Day still remains connected with various regional customs in England. In Norfolk, a character called 'Jack' Valentine knocks on the rear door of houses leaving sweets and presents for children. Although he was leaving treats, many children were scared of this mystical person.
Norfolk sounds neat.
This week was a little rough. I received news that a handful of my loved ones are facing mortality. It reminded me of what it's all about.
My grandpa is having some health issues. He is 81. In my mind, William Norris Eaton has always been the epitome of strapping. He was (is) an athlete. He coached football, wrestling, and track for 30 years. Last year - LAST YEAR - he took me, my bro and his kids on a crazy bushwhacking hike to the top of a ridge in Maine for a view of the sun going down. He could be shwhacking right now for all I know.
Growing up, going to visit Buff & Muff (my mom's dad and mom) was equated with physical pain. "Hey we're going to see [physical pain] soon!" It was always humbling. (I just now realized that most people probably haven't harbored shame their whole lives for being weaker than their grandparents...) I remember biking in the Everglades between a bunch of damn crocodiles when I was eight. I was so worn out and so terrified. Buff & Muff's idea. I remember hiking up Mount Washington with Buff when I was eleven and nearly dying. I distinctly remember thinking on the way up,"This guy has something against me. I'M INNOCENT!" (The irony being hiking becoming a passion of mine). I remember getting cross country skis for Christmas that same year and immediately being forced to use them. On Christmas Day! Cross country skiing is exhausting! Why can't we sit around eating cinnamon rolls?? All Buff & Muff. I could go on. Strapping.
I love this man. I don't think he knows how much. I didn't get to see him often growing up and don't get to much even now and it stings. I wish I could go off and live with him & Muff up on the farm until he gets better, listening to his wisdom and his stories (his students used to call him Sage), watching him watch sports. I'm sure he's going to be fine. He's an ox. (Strapping.)
Buff wasn't going to be a part of this post, but I'm glad he is. He represents the people in our lives that we wish could be present with us always. Sometimes I wish I could move into my brother Curt's house and nanny his children until I'm old and barren. Sometimes I wish I could live with my brother Jared so we could support each other through our rough times. Sometimes I wish my best friend was a man so we could get married and live happily ever after in a tiny house. But that's not how this works. Our loved ones have their own families or have passed on to the other side or maybe just don't want anyone around. Out of one's control. There's still stuff we can do and people we can share ourselves with.
I watch children for a living. I've had the normal jobs with the more impressive titles, but nothing fulfills me like this does. I get to love tiny persons and absorb their goodness as I study them and attempt to be like them. Children are the ultimate humans. They love purely. They remind me everyday that the point of all this is each other. Serving each other, expressing love in the "constant concern for the well-being of others" sort of way. I'm so grateful that I have been blessed with more than zero loved ones in my life. I have a few friends that, if they did not exist, I would have absolutely descended into a dark and destructive place. I'm grateful to know that I'm not alone when I am alone. I'm grateful I have a strong belief in the hereafter and in the eternal nature of love. One eternal round.
In the words of St. Chaucer, if you can't be with the one you love honey, love the one you're with. Everything is going to be ok, you guys.
Your Valentine,
Katherine Elizabeth Cardon
Granddaughter of William & Marilyn Eaton
